Soundtrack for the Day

Phantom Planet - California
Grandaddy - A.M. 180
Godspeed You Black Emperor! - East Hastings
Radiohead - The Tourist
Blur - The Universal
The Ataris - My So-Called Life
Fiona Apple - Fast As You Can
Coldplay - Spies

Haunted Elevators and etc.

Hey, this whole blogger thing has a new format for posting, uhm, sorta. Not really, it just looks spruced up a bit. I suppose this is why blogger was closed a couple days ago when i wanted to post. I don't really remember what i wanted to post about, but after i couldn't get in because the site was "under repairs", i wanted to post how i wasn't too happy that i couldn't post in the first place. And that's where irony kicked in. Oh well...

Any who, yes, the title of this entry. Thankfully it doesn't describe any of the dreams i've been having lately, though they have been extremely weird and vivid once again. Last night i had one that was sort of picturing my life as something out of the Great Gatsby or something. It felt as if i was a spectator trapped in some living, breathing film narrative that dealt with betrayal and greed in 1930's New England...or something like that. Maybe i didn't really remember all that well...Yes, but back to the haunted elevator thing, it's basically talking about this so-bad-it's-gotta-be-good direct-to-dvd movie i rented on a recommendation this weekend called, uhm, "The Shaft"...i felt a little embarrassed going up to the clerk at Blockbuster and renting it, fearing that they might think i was renting a really bad porno or something. As it turned out, i would've been embarrassed any ways if they really knew what it was, which was a really, really, really hilariously-bad horror movie about, yep, a haunted elevator. I have no idea where to begin, but let's just say there were lines such as "If you can't trust elevators, what can you trust?!"...yep, pretty bad. But in an amusing, i-can't-believe-someone-financed-this kinda way.

I was going to talk about something else, but i forget what it was. It'll probably come to me at 2 in the morning or so...Oh well.

Soundtrack for the Day

Radiohead - Wolf at the Door
The Ataris - Beautiful Mistake
Ben Folds - Philosophy
Fiona Apple - Across the Universe
Further Seems Forever - Wearing Thin
Jane's Addiction - Just Because
Super Furry Animals - Something for the Weekend
The Used - The Taste of Ink
Beck - Paper Tiger

I Think I've Finally Learned How To Do Titles / Blogger, If You Lose One More of My Posts, You're Going On My Enemy List

I just spent a little bit describing another one of my weirdly-vivid dreams in great detail, but Blogger once again decided to lose it into the depths of cyber hell. Sigh. Let's see if i can slightly re-construct what i wrote, uhm: I did finally learn how to use the "bold" function, so i can make proper titles for my entries. I really have no idea why i couldn't figure it out earlier... Of course, this is assuming i got it right this time, so we'll probably just have to wait and see...and this is all assuming blogger won't lose this post, which is another wait-and-see situation. But since i've learned how to bold everything, this means i'll have to come up with titles for my entries, which means that let's just forget i mentioned anything about how to use the bold thing...We'll just go back to a simpler time when i didn't know how to bold titles, and when elves roamed the world baking cookies and stealing socks. I think. I have no idea what i just said (it all made sense and sounded better in the original post, i think...)

Any who, i've been having very weird and vivid dreams lately. So far there's been that one with the headless zombies (but they had noses...), the projection booth in the basement covered in very-still bees (I have no idea...) and the one where i was Wolverine taking on Freddy Krueger (Even stranger than it sounds...). Last night came another strange and vivid one. I was walking around my neighborhood, which was vacant and eerily quiet, and suddenly i spot a horse. I found this kind of odd for my usually horse-free street, so i went over and started to pet it. Suddenly, a whole slew of other animals start appearing. Squirrels, dogs, deers...and, uhm, un-friendly looking bears and something that i can only describe as a cross between that marmot-creature in the Big Lebowski and a rabid beast from hell.

Suddenly, all the animals start chasing me down the street, especially this marmot-turned-creature-of-eternal-darkness thing. I jump up in the air, and then i, for some reason or another, start to glide over the ground, in a sorta-flying-but-not-really state. This goes on for a couple seconds, and then i fall down, hard. I come face to ugly, blood-thirsty face with this marmot-thing and just as it's about to go for what looks like my face, it gets blown over by a sudden gust of wind. I look around and there are helicopters everywhere. People in those virus-protection suits, the white ones with the visors in the front and the voices like Darth Vader because of the gas masks, are everywhere, climbing out of the helicopters and rounding up all the animals that have been running rampant. They begin to set up machinery to identify all the animals, and then as i begin to look around for someone to give me an explanation, i wake up.

Uhm, yes...very weird. I think i should really stop eating so much nutella before i go to bed...too much sugar in the bloodstream..i think it somehow makes its way into fusing with my brain waves...very strange...

It's been a little bit since i've updated, and i should probably do a proper post, but it's kinda late and i'm in that half-conscious/half-awake mode right now...but i think i should write something...

The last couple days have been pretty unevenful, but i did manage to finish "The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay" by Michael Chabon, and i think it's probably one of the greatest stories i've ever read. I can't quite articulate what i thought was so great about it, but the story itself just hooked me in and made me believe in these characters more so than i've ever really felt before in a novel. It created characters that you wanted to succeed, to overcome everything that's thrown at them and cheer them on to the rest of thier lives. I don't think i've ever read a better novel that painted it's characters so well, and intertwined at the same time a whole era's set of themes and realities. I should probably take some more time to write a really proper, articulate post praising the book...it's just a bloody brilliant story. A beautiful read, i guess.


I also managed to finish (over the course of about 3 nights) the almost 4-hour long "Once Upon A Time in America" dvd. I was surprised how much i didn't remember of it (though the last time i saw it was when i was 13 or so, watching a badly taped version of it that was about an hour shorter than this one...) and how gruesome parts of it can be, especially involving some twists in the characters that really caught me off guard. Overall, a great movie, though, but one that really makes it hard for the audience to accept certain things that happens in it...i want to say more, but i don't want to spoil it...The film's sorta like "Kavalier and Clay", it's epic-like in scope, i suppose... I'm not sure exactly what i'm talking about...I should really write a more coherent review on "Once Upon a Time" and "Kavlier and Clay" sometime...maybe another time...i dunno...

Here's a really late-night version of Soundtrack for the Day, though, since i've got most of these songs continually repeating on my playlist and they're all stuck rotating in my head..
Radiohead - 2+2 = 5
Coldplay - The Scientist
The White Stripes - Black Math
The Juliana Theory - If I Told You This Was Killing Me, Would You Stop?
Soundtrack of Our Lives - Sister Surround
The Ataris - All the You Can Ever Learn You Already Know
And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead - Relative Ways
Blur - Brothers and Sisters

Some random, bizzare occurences in my house: As i'm heading downstairs to grab a glass of milk before i try and attempt to fall asleep (ie. watch seinfeld until i pass out), i notice a light is on downstairs. I'm sorta disappointed when it's not aliens coming to tell me of government conspiracies (but relieved that it's not headless zombies, which have been bothering me a little lately..), but instead it's my brother, and his friend Jesse, just chatting away. This was kinda odd, i thought, so i asked him why he had a friend over at about 12:30 or so in the morning on a school night (now i sound like a really old parent...but still, kinda odd...especially since i'm pretty sure my parents didn't know about this late-night visitor). He just casually responds "Doing some work...g'night." He then gives me the "get-the-hell-outta-here" look, which i recognized pretty quickly since i think i taught him it. They're still talking downstairs...and if my parents happen to wake up, which i know my dad's bound to do sooner or later (i don't think he's ever gotten a consecutive 4 hours of sleep in his entire life), it's going to be a fairly awkward situation.

Very strange, or maybe it's just me, i don't know. Of course, since i've been having trouble with simple functions lately (ie. brushing my teeth and putting on clothes in their proper order) i walked straight into a wall while coming back upstairs. One of my fingers was pointing out for some reason, and then the nail of it smashed up against the wall, causing a nice little jolt of pain. Actually, it still kinda hurts to even type...maybe i should stop...

Soundtrack for the Day (uhm, or "evening"...)
Radiohead - Myxamatosis
Neil Young - Goin' Home
Blur - Out of Time
Soundtrack of Our Lives - Still Aging
The Ataris - So Long, Astoria
The Juliana Theory - To the Tune of 5000 Screaming
Weezer - The Good Life
OAR - That Was A Crazy Game of Poker
Cake - Sheeps Go to Heaven, Goats Go to Hell

As predicted, i awoke from my restless sleep yesterday night with a couple more alliterated comic book character names floating around in my head. It was about 2:45 in the morning or so, and since i could tell i wasn't going to get some sleep anytime soon, i decided to post the new names i came up with...and a couple extra, with a little help from some mildly-obsessive online comic sites.

Then, of course, blogger decides once again to go Scorsese on me. It's kinda getting into this pattern that whenever i want to post something between midnight and 4 in the morning or so, blogger decides to just not co-operate. Urgh...

Here's the rest of the names, though:
Moira Mactaggert (from X-Men), Matt Murdock (Daredevil), Wade Wilson (Deadpool, from X-Men), Otto Octavius (Dr. Octopus from Spider-Man), Susan Storm (The Invisible Woman from the Fantastic Four), J. Jonah Jameson (from Spider-Man, the best name out of them all..), Curt Conners (the Lizard from Spider-Man), Warren Worthington (Angel from X-Men), Brian Braddock (Captain Britain from Excalibur), Sebastian Shaw (from the Hellfire Club in X-Men)..

I was going to write about this great trend i noticed in comic books, and how a lot of characters names are alliterated. I don't know why I got to thinking about this, i think it may have been because i was breaking down "X-Men 2" at work and letting my mind wander at the same time. But then as i began to write all the names i could think of, i realized there's a couple, but not really as much as i was making it out in my head. Here's a couple, though:

Bruce Banner (Hulk), Reed Richards (Mr. Fantastic from the Fantastic Four), Lois Lane, Clark Kent (well, this is kind of a stretch, but it still sounds the same...), Scott Summers (Cyclops), Peter Parker (Spiderman), the Green Goblin, Doctor Doom, and Silver Surfer.

I'm positive that there's more out there, and that i had them in my head a while ago, but now they're all gone. Hmm...now this glorious blog post i had in my head about comic book names is gone....damn...the worst part is i'm probably going to remember them at about 3 or 4 in the morning while i'm tossing and turning in bed...

Soundtrack for the Day:
Radiohead - There, There
The Ataris - In This Diary
And You Will Know Us From the Trial of Dead - Relative Ways
Manic Street Preachers - You Stole the Sunshine of My Heart
The Juliana Theory - You Always Say Goodnight, Goodnight
Widespread Panic - Climb to Safety
Ben Folds Five - The Ascent of Stan
Soundtrack of Our Lives - Keep the Line Movin'
Tenacious D - Tribute to the Best Song In the World

Sure enough, I spotted Jack a little after 9:30 this morning, just an hour after the shiva ended. I noticed him as I was just about to collapse into my bed, attempting to get some sleep, as I only got about two hours last night. I had to wake up for 7 this morning, and i didn't get to bed last night until about 3. Then there was the whole issue of actually falling asleep. I just couldn't do it last night. No matter how many episodes of Seinfeld or Simpsons i tried to watch, no matter how much i tried to read, i just couldn't pass out. I knew i wanted to, that i had to, but i couldn't. Every time i closed my eyes i just felt compelled to open them as quickly as possible. I don't really know why.

The house is empty and quiet now. Both my parents are sleeping, and my brother is off at school. My grandmother's at her apartment, alone. I don't really like the idea of her being alone there right now, attempting to clean up my grandfather's things all by herself. She held back the tears on the ride over there, but i knew the second i left her she'd probably be crying. I really don't like that idea at all, but my dad said it's the best thing right now. She's been constantly surrounded by people for the last week, not a second to herself, and now she needs the time to herself to mourn and cry and remember in private. It's true, i guess, but right now i just don't want to imagine her crying by herself in that apartment.

I don't feel very well right now. Kinda shitty, actually. My stomach is feeling like it's decomposing from the inside out, and the air in my room feels like it has some sort of sickly, stale quality to it that just isn't right. My mind's in a few different places right now, none of them really all that good. I'm thinking of writing an obituary for the back section of the globe and mail. It was my dad's idea, I actually never knew they accepted them from amateur writers, but apparently people send them in all the time and if the globe chooses to, they put them in the paper. They're fairly long articles, taking about half a page or so. I think it sounds like a really good idea, so i'll probably get working on that soon..

Jack the bunny rabbit hasn't showed up here in a few days. I've been constantly looking out my window, trying to spot him, maybe crouching down by the pine tree or with some sort of grass-like camouflage on (he's a smart rabbit, you never know...) But, if he is out there, i haven't seen him. I mentioned this to my dad and he said that maybe he's the sort of rabbit who doesn't like big crowds of people or jewish praying. I replied that, if so, he's my kinda rabbit. He laughed. That made me feel really good, for some reason.

I've been listening to this song on a constant loop, so i thought i'd share it with everyone. It's always been my favorite song, and though a lot of favorites change over the years, i'm pretty confident this one will stay with me for a while.

Paul Simon - "Graceland"

The Mississippi delta
Was shining like a national guitar
I am following the river, down the highway
Through the cradle of the Civil War

I'm going to Graceland, Graceland
In Memphis, Tennessee
I'm going to Graceland
Poorboys and pilgrims with families
And we are going to Graceland

My traveling companion is nine years old
He is the child of my first marriage
But I've reason to believe
We both will be received
In Graceland

She comes back to tell me she's gone
As if I didn't know that
As if I didn't know my own bed
As if I'd never noticed
The way she brushed her hair from her forehead

And she said losing love
Is like a window in your heart
Everybody sees you're blown apart
Everybody sees the wind blow

I'm going to Graceland
Memphis, Tennessee
I'm going to Graceland
Poorboys and Pilgrims with families
And we are going to Graceland

And my traveling companions
Are ghosts and empty sockets
I'm looking at ghosts and empties
But I've reason to believe
We all will be received
In Graceland

There is a girl in New York City
Who calls herself the human trampoline
And sometimes when I'm falling, flying
Or tumbling in turmoil I say
Whoa, so this is what she means
She means we're bouncing into Graceland

And I see losing love
Is like a window in your heart
Everybody sees you're blown apart
Everybody feels the wind blow

In Graceland, in Graceland
I'm going to Graceland
For reasons I cannot explain
There's some part of me wants to see Graceland
And I may be obliged to defend
Every love, every ending
Or maybe there's no obligations now
Maybe I've a reason to believe
We all will be received
In Graceland

Whoa-oh-oh-oh, in Graceland, in Graceland,in Graceland
I'm going to Graceland

There's a bunny rabbit that's been living in our backyard for the past couple months or so. Well, not really living there, but every afternoon if it's nice enough outside it comes by to just lay in the grass and hop around for a couple hours. I've kind of named him Jack, just because the first thing that pops into my mind when i think of bunny rabbits is either Peter or Bugs or the Jack Rabbit Slim's restaurant from Pulp Fiction. Plus, i've always liked the name Jack for some reason.

It's always nice to wake up and see Jack there, just lazing about, nibbling on some blades of grass and doing everything that bunny rabbits do. Very peaceful and simple. I thought at first that he liked coming in our backyard because for a while, i had neglected to mow the lawn, and the grass was pretty high, creating something sort of like a meadow for him, where he could hide and lay about. But even after i cut it, he still came. I don't know where he really lives, there's a couple parks nearby, and sometimes i'll see him scurry off in a hurry under our fence to wherever it is he goes, but usually any given afternoon he can be found just out back.

I don't really know why Jack just popped into my mind, i guess it's because it's just something simple and beautiful and something that i can constantly look towards as showing what nature is. I dunno. Maybe it's because i'm just sort of trying to figure out nature and all of its processes. The whole cycle. I did some thinking about that today. Everything has its set of processes, but that doesn't really mean we have to just let things go and forget about them. I don't think any of that last sentence made all that much sense. But, i still miss him. My grandfather, not Jack (though i miss Jack too, but it's late now and dark outside..i'm sure he'll pop up tomorrow sometime...) It's strange, though, having the rest of the family around the house, but not him. It's just especially wierd having my grandmother here but not him. It's strange seeing them seperated. I miss seeing them together. I miss seeing him.

But as i was thinking about the whole nature thing and the Jack tangent which started it off, i know he's not really gone. He's just as gone only as much as a day has passed, maybe. The day is gone, you can't get it back, but you can have it's memories, and you can look forward to the next. I don't know, i don't think that made sense. I just maybe think that although he is gone, i can't see him anymore or listen to him, his memory isn't gone at all. It comes back every day, in the form of a new memory or of a new feeling or of something that reminds me of him more and more. Just like in nature a new day comes, with new feelings and new memories...

...right now "Stairway to Heaven" just came on my stereo off the new Led Zeppelin live albulm. It fits just about right. It's such a bloody beautiful, passionate song. Yeah, it definitely fits perfectly.